Mother-of-7 and reality TV star Queen Nandi Talks Parenting, Purpose and Public Scrutiny

Motherhood for Nandipha Mlombi (better known as Queen Nandi) is more than a role; it’s a journey of love, faith and fearless purpose. Together with her husband, Reverend Mawuzole “Rev Zole” Mlombi, the reality TV star is raising seven children and facing life’s toughest challenges with unwavering determination.

In the world of reality television, where few families truly connect with viewers, this couple has captured public affection. Their new show, Nandi and The Rev on Mzansi Magic, offers an unfiltered look into their lives, highlighting the triumphs and trials of parenting seven children while navigating marriage, faith, and everyday family dynamics.

Known for her candidness and steadfast faith, Queen Nandi approaches parenting with intentionality and purpose. Despite the scrutiny that often accompanies reality TV, her commitment to family remains unshaken.

Nandi and The Rev invites viewers into a space where faith, family and authenticity converge. It offers a refreshing take on modern parenting rooted in personal values.

Nandi has faced criticism for embracing a luxurious lifestyle amid financial strain in her marriage. She’s also been scrutinised for expressing herself boldly on social media, celebrating her style, and defying the conventional image of a pastor’s wife. Meanwhile, Rev Zole has drawn criticism for relying on church donations following a dispute with his congregation. Yet through it all, Nandi continues to live with confidence and authenticity.

In conversation with Goodwill Thomo, she opens up about motherhood, raising seven children, and the highs and lows of her marriage, revealing the courage and resilience behind every choice she makes.

Congratulations on welcoming your 7th child. How was your delivery?

The birth of Ndiyakholwa Mlombi was phenomenal. It reminded me that as humans, we underestimate our abilities and that other people’s limitations are not mine.

How has motherhood been for you, especially with a newborn now?

If I said it was easy, I’d be lying. Parenting in the fourth industrial revolution is a new challenge; I’ve never seen my mother or grandmother raise children in this era. But anything worthwhile requires effort and dedication, and I’m committed to giving my kids a meaningful human experience. At 38, motherhood feels more honest and relaxed. I’m kind to myself, more chilled, and simply enjoying my baby and other children.

How do you balance being fearless and staying grounded when making big decisions for your children every day?

What grounds me is knowing that God’s plans are never to harm us, but to prosper us to give us hope and a future. I have complete faith in Him, and that’s where my fearlessness comes from: knowing that everything works together for my good. Before making decisions, I always remind myself that I’m not raising ordinary kids; I’m raising leaders and game changers. That means sometimes I must make bold choices that even scare me, but I push forward, trembling if I must, holding my cubs with my teeth like a lioness.

What family values are most important to you to pass down to your kids, especially faith and honesty?

I want them to always honour their mother and father, and by that, I don’t only mean Rev and me, but every grown-up. Respect is very important in our home. Secondly, I teach them love, because anything done in love will always win. And lastly, I emphasise truth. The truth has a way of coming out no matter what, and it will always set you free.

On Nandi and The Rev, you mentioned trying to raise children with Christian values. What does that look like in daily practice at home?

We instil a prayerful life. We read scriptures together and fast as a family whenever there’s a pressing issue. Taking them to church used to be part of our rhythm, until church itself became complicated.

What boundaries are non-negotiable in your home, especially regarding respect and behaviour?

For me, manners are non-negotiable. A child must use prefixes when addressing adults and always say “please” and “thank you.” Good manners are the foundation of respect.

How do you teach your children humility and gratitude?

What outsiders see as glamorous is just our norm. I don’t glorify lack, but I also remind them they were born with nothing and will leave with nothing. They’re very grateful children; they see how hard we work to keep things afloat, and that humbles them.

ALSO READ: The Importance of Teaching Kids the Attitude of Gratitude Early On

How do you teach your kids responsibility, especially under public scrutiny?

To parent a child, you must first parent yourself. Growing up, I was responsible for my younger siblings, and though I felt robbed of my childhood, I now see it as a gift. It taught me discipline and responsibility, which shaped my life. I teach my kids the same by having them care for their younger siblings. It may not make sense to them now, but one day they’ll realise these lessons have shaped their leadership.

With many children, how do you make sure each one feels individually valued?

With seven kids across different ages, it’s not easy to do everything individually. So, we focus on being a family. Their individuality comes out in conversations at the dinner table or on school runs. We touch base daily, which helps us see them as individuals and helps them appreciate one another’s uniqueness. For example, if one is passionate about soccer, we support them as a family.

What routines or rituals help maintain calm and order, especially with school transport challenges?

Having our own transport makes things easier. We have a seven-seater, so we load everyone in and do all the drop-offs, while the home-schooled ones stay home or get taken to the park for playtime with other kids. Afternoon naps are also key; they give me a moment of peace for myself and my husband.

How do you handle conflict among your children?

Conflict varies with age, so I use the “talk it out” method I learned from my father. He was like a judge in our childhood disputes; we’d present our sides, and whoever was wrong would have to apologise and make it right. I still use this today. Most importantly, I teach them to love one another so that even in my absence, whatever they do, they do in love.

What do you want your children to remember most about their childhood?

That they were loved deeply and unconditionally. They didn’t need to do anything to earn my love, and nothing they could ever do would make me stop loving them.

How do you and your husband decide together about what’s best for the kids when finances are tight or uncertain?

My husband and I see things differently. He looks at the cost and tries to find the cheapest way, while I think about a long-term solution rather than a quick fix. Because of these differences, I often take on responsibility myself and only go to him when I’m struggling.

When your husband was unemployed, how did you support him while leading the household?

His unemployment took a toll on his masculinity and mental health, so I gave him space to process while I held the fort. Eventually, I felt he was taking too long to mourn the loss of his job, but by God’s grace and with a strong support system, I managed to carry us through.

ALSO READ: Nozipho Ntshangase on her 8 kids

How do you explain the difference between “wants” and “needs” to your kids, especially when living in a rental house far from school?

Fortunately, we are very open with our older kids. We can explain, “This is what we’d like, but finances don’t allow it right now.” This helps them understand the difference between needs and wants. It also teaches them to express their wishes, knowing they may or may not happen, and to accept them with maturity.

How do you manage the stress of transport costs and distance from school without it affecting your kids?

Providing for my children is my responsibility, but when I struggle, I feel guilty. I’m learning that older kids notice these struggles, so I’ve started communicating more openly with them. If we can’t provide something, we talk about it. Sometimes they even suggest solutions. It has turned us into confident individuals for one another as we navigate life.

How do you and Zole divide parenting roles and responsibilities?

We’re opposites, but after 16 years of marriage, we’ve learned to complement each other. Our roles align with our strengths. He’s a morning person who wakes the kids and bonds with them then. I enjoy driving, so I do school runs. He loves sports, so he plays with the boys. I’m a content creator, so I capture memories. We focus on what we can do rather than what we can’t.

What parenting role models do you draw from when you feel overwhelmed?

I think of my grandmother, who raised 20 grandchildren and relatives’ kids while running gardens and a mealie farm. She taught us “vuk’uzenzele,” to stand up and do things for ourselves. I also look at my mother, who raised four of her late brother’s children along with her own. These women carried so much with such grace, and I draw strength from them. In today’s world, I also look at Kris Jenner, who reminds me that I’m not an ordinary woman raising ordinary children, so it won’t be easy, but the bigger picture matters.

What legacy do you hope to leave for your children?

That they can be anything they want to be. Giving up is never an option. I want them to be resilient leaders who see failure not as defeat, but as an opportunity to learn and grow.

Your show, Nandi and The Rev, has been praised for being raw and unfiltered. Why was it important to be so open?

I hate lies. The truth always comes out, so I knew our show had to be real. Too many reality shows portray fake lives that leave ordinary people depressed when they can’t measure up. Nandi and The Rev had to be raw and relatable to give people hope.

Why did you say yes to reality TV, and what do you hope viewers take away?

I wanted to inspire a generation that gives up too easily. Relationships are not perfect; they’re tested. Too many marriages end because people stop fixing what’s broken. We glorify quitting, and it leads to broken families. Nandi and The Rev is proof that people can overcome struggles and come out stronger. I hope our viewers remember that umuntu ngumntu ngabantu (we are human through others). People are not disposable. Stop giving up on those you love.

How do you balance sharing personal moments on TV while protecting your family’s dignity?

Yes, we’ve shared vulnerable moments that opened us up to scrutiny, but they brought us closer. We’ve become each other’s best friends with more love, respect, and emotional support than ever before. We can laugh at ourselves and still focus on the good.