“Not tonight, I have a headache” – ways to get over no libido

Published: Updated: 4 minutes read
“Not tonight, I have a headache” – ways to get over no libido

Low libido is a topic that affects many individuals and relationships. A frequently heard excuse is, "Not tonight, I have a headache". This phrase often symbolises deeper issues related to diminished desire. The discussion on "Not tonight, I have a headache" – ways to get over no libido examines the various factors that contribute to low sexual desire. It considers aspects such as stress, fatigue, and emotional well-being in a clear and factual manner. If you liked this prompt, please like it so we can keep improving it! Written by Dr Jireh Serfontein, sexual health practitioner.

“Not tonight baby, I have a headache”. “Not tonight, I am tired”. “Not tonight…not tonight”.

Low libido is a very common sexual concern and something I deal with in my practice every day. Both men and women can be affected by a lack of sexual desire. Before we can manage the problem, we need to understand the reasons behind it.

Once you know the reason behind your low libido, it’s not just a quick fix.

Some tools you can use to get over low or no libido

Communication

Communication is the foundation of a good relationship and having a good relationship will, of course, help your sex life. Talk to your partner about what your expectations are with regards to your sex life. If you are happy with sex twice a month and your partner wants sex more often, you can meet each other halfway. It is also important to talk about what you need. Your partner won’t know which buttons to press if you don’t communicate.

Spend more time together

This may sound very straightforward but quality time with your partner might be the only thing you need to relight the candle. You need to spend time with your partner outside the bedroom to get things better inside the bedroom. Set time out for regular date nights and just enjoy each other’s company.

Foreplay, foreplay and more foreplay

For most women, their libido is a responsive sexual desire. This means that once there is stimulation and you become aroused you will respond to that with a desire to have sex. In many cases, people can enhance their sexual experiences by spending more time on touching, kissing and using sex toys. Having better sexual experiences will increase your desire for sex.

Manage stress

Let’s face it, we all have stress. Unfortunately, stress can negatively impact your libido. Studies have shown that depression and anxiety in guys reduce libido and increase sexual dysfunction. There are several things you can do to manage anxiety, including:

  • Getting enough sleep
  • Regular exercise
  • Get a hobby
  • See a counsellor

Get your hormones checked

Low testosterone is something that can affect both men and women. Testosterone is a hormone that is crucial for normal sexual function. Without it, you might experience low libido, poor arousal and difficulty reaching an orgasm.

As I mentioned before, there is no quick fix to increase libido. If you feel that your libido is not where it should be you can try the things we just discussed. But if you still struggle, you might need to see a sexologist or a sexual health doctor. Get the help you need, as having a healthy sex life is your right.

BabyYumYum FAQs: “Not tonight, I have a headache” – Overcoming Low Libido

What are common reasons for low libido?

Low libido can be caused by stress, fatigue, hormonal fluctuations, and even physical issues like headaches or other pain. It’s a complex interplay of physical, emotional, and lifestyle factors.

How can managing a headache help boost sexual desire?

Headaches not only cause physical discomfort but can also disrupt your mood and energy levels. Addressing headache triggers—such as stress, dehydration, or lack of sleep—can help restore your overall well-being, potentially leading to improved libido.

What lifestyle changes might improve low libido?

Incorporating regular exercise, ensuring sufficient sleep, managing stress through techniques like meditation, and maintaining a balanced diet can all help boost your energy and hormonal balance, thereby enhancing libido.

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Are there specific foods that can help increase libido?

Yes. Nutrient-rich foods high in zinc, omega-3 fatty acids, and antioxidants—such as oysters, nuts, seeds, and leafy greens—support hormonal health and may help enhance sexual desire.

Can communication with my partner improve my libido?

Absolutely. Open, honest conversations about your feelings, needs, and any physical discomfort can reduce misunderstandings and help create a more supportive, intimate atmosphere.

How does stress affect sexual desire?

Stress can lead to the release of cortisol, which may disrupt hormone levels and reduce libido. Managing stress with techniques like deep breathing, mindfulness, or counselling can improve your overall mood and interest in intimacy.

Is exercise beneficial for boosting libido?

Yes, regular exercise improves blood circulation, increases energy, and helps reduce stress—all of which can contribute to a healthier libido. Even moderate activities like walking or yoga can make a significant difference.

Can improving sleep quality affect my sex drive?

Definitely. Adequate, quality sleep is essential for hormonal regulation and energy. Prioritising sleep can help alleviate fatigue and enhance your overall mood, thereby positively impacting libido.

Are natural supplements an option for low libido?

Some people find that supplements such as maca root or ginseng help boost libido. However, it’s important to consult a healthcare professional before starting any new supplement regimen.

How might therapy or counselling help with low libido?

Talking to a therapist or counsellor can address underlying emotional issues or relationship challenges that might be contributing to low libido. Therapy can also offer strategies for stress management and improving self-esteem.

What role does hydration play in sexual health?

Staying well-hydrated supports overall bodily functions, including hormone regulation and energy levels, which are crucial for maintaining a healthy libido.

The Lily Rose Collection
The Lily Rose Collection
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When should I seek professional help for low libido?

If lifestyle changes and self-care strategies don’t improve your libido, or if you experience persistent issues accompanied by other symptoms, it’s a good idea to consult a healthcare professional for personalised advice and treatment options.

 

Disclaimer: The above information is intended as general guidance and is not a substitute for personalised medical advice. Always consult a healthcare professional for advice tailored to your individual needs.

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