Expert How Touch and Breastfeeding Help Babies Feel Safe

Long before your baby could focus on your face, they knew you through touch. In the womb, touch was their whole world — the pressure of the amniotic sac, the rhythm of your movements, your heartbeat. So, it makes sense that once they arrive earthside, touch remains one of the most powerful tools you have to help them feel safe and connected. More than comfort, that same touch plays a direct physiological role in supporting breastfeeding success.

The Breast Crawl: Nature’s First Move

Ever heard of the “breast crawl”? This is the remarkable instinct newborns display when placed skin‑to‑skin on their mother’s abdomen straight after an unmedicated birth. The baby instinctively wriggles upward toward the breast and self‑attaches, often within 60 to 90 minutes. No instructions needed — it’s wired into them. This early skin‑to‑skin contact isn’t just tender; it’s functional. It stimulates prolactin, the hormone that drives milk production and it helps babies arrive at the breast calmer and more regulated, making latching smoother for both mother and child.

When Breastfeeding Doesn’t Go As Planned

Almost every mother starts out intending to breastfeed, but not every mother can. When that happens, the feelings that follow, such as grief, guilt or disappointment, shouldn’t be dismissed.

There are many reasons breastfeeding can become difficult:

• A preterm baby with a reduced or absent suck reflex
• Twins or multiple births
• Health conditions such as mastitis, or a mastectomy
• Tongue-tie, where restricted tongue movement makes it hard for baby to latch correctly
• Postnatal depression — one of the most common contributing factors
• Social or cultural circumstances

If this is your story, understand that you are not failing. Whether you’re exclusively breastfeeding, combination feeding, or formula feeding, touch remains a tool every parent can use to bond, soothe, and support their baby’s development.

Two Hormones, Two Different Jobs

This is where infant massage steps in; it is also where two often-confused hormones deserve a proper introduction.

Oxytocin, often nicknamed the “love hormone,” is released during skin-to-skin contact and massage. Its standout job during breastfeeding is triggering the let-down reflex — the mechanism that releases milk from the breast. It’s also central to bonding, trust and that flooding sense of connection between parent and baby.

Serotonin works differently. It’s a neurotransmitter — a chemical messenger in the brain — that helps regulate mood, sleep, appetite, digestion, memory and learning. Every time you massage your baby, cortisol (the stress hormone) drops and serotonin rises. At the same time, massage activates the vagus nerve, directly improving digestion, breathing and heart rate regulation.

Put simply: oxytocin connects and releases; serotonin calms and regulates. Together, they’re a powerful physiological duo and infant massage triggers both.

ALSO READ: Breastfeeding Tracker Printable – Download for Free

Why This Matters for Feeding, Sleep, and Everything In Between

When a baby is massaged regularly, their nervous system learns something essential: I am safe. That message shows up in real, observable ways:

• Calmer, more regulated babies who latch more easily
• Less crying, faster settling, better coping with new sights and sounds
• Reduced colic, wind, and tummy trouble
• For babies with reflux, studies show regular massage can reduce symptom severity within a few weeks — meaning less comfort-feeding and more settled, traditional feeds

How to Start: A Gentle First Step

Try this simple ritual while breastfeeding: rub one hand slowly down the front of your own chest, grounding yourself first. Then ask your baby’s permission to massage — yes, really. Watch for their cues. A relaxed body, eye contact and open hands are “yes” signals. Turning away, arching, or fussing are “not right now.”

If you get the green light, gentle strokes down the back, hands and legs are a beautiful place to begin. A few important notes: never massage directly after a feed (reflux and hiccups make this uncomfortable), and always avoid pressure on the diaphragm.

What This Looks Like Day to Day

Infant massage doesn’t need to be a formal, scheduled event with oils and a routine, although it certainly can be, once you’re confident. In its simplest form, it’s woven into the moments you already share: the pause after a nappy change, the quiet minutes before a nap, or a few slow strokes down baby’s back while they rest on your chest after a feed (once any reflux or hiccups have settled).

What matters most isn’t perfect technique; it’s consistency and connection. Even five minutes a day of intentional, gentle touch can begin to build the calming, co-regulating rhythm that benefits both you and your baby. Over time, many parents notice their baby anticipates the ritual, settling into it with visible relaxation, which is a sign that the nervous system has learned to associate touch with safety.

For breastfeeding mothers, this rhythm fits naturally into a wider feeding routine: skin-to-skin before a feed to support let-down, gentle strokes afterwards to aid digestion and quiet touch throughout the day to reinforce security.

Mama, You Already Have Everything You Need

This Breastfeeding Month, remember: the gift isn’t complicated. It’s already in your hands. Learn simple, safe techniques that support bonding, breastfeeding and calm for both of you.

Want to learn more? Thula Touch Infant Massage Therapy, led by South Africa’s only IMIS-certified instructor CIMi-Aus, offers hands-on classes designed to help you turn everyday moments into powerful bonding rituals. Whether you’re breastfeeding, bottle-feeding, or somewhere in between, these techniques belong to every family.

Reach out to Thula Touch to book your class and discover the language your baby has been speaking to you all along.