Thoughts moms have while breastfeeding are rarely talked about, but every mum knows just how busy the brain gets during those quiet nursing sessions. One minute you're admiring tiny fingers, the next you're wondering if you defrosted the chicken. Between mental checklists, emotional reflection and the occasional guilty Google search, breastfeeding is rarely just about feeding. It’s a full-on mind-and-body experience. By Tshepy Matloga
Rest and comfort are an integral part of successful breastfeeding. We talk to 5 ladies about what they think about while breastfeeding…
Iman, 32 years old, first-time mother
” I like to use breastfeeding time to bond with my baby, so I usually just think about how cute and precious she is. Sometimes I also think about my to-do-list for the day or what I am going to cook for dinner, but mostly I just focus on enjoying the moment with my little one”
Puleng, 36 years old, mother of twins
“Breastfeeding my twins is a logistical nightmare, so I mostly think about how to position them in a way that is comfortable for everyone. I also try to keep track of who last ate and for how long. It is a lot to juggle, but I feel proud when I’m able to make it work.”
Grace, 26 years old, mother of two
“I use breastfeeding to catch up on TV shows or listen to my favourite podcasts. It’s a good way for me to stay entertained while I sit there. I do stay focused on my baby too to make sure she is latching right, but I do think it is important to take care of myself and have fun too.”
Warona, 27 years old, first-time mother
“I often think about how tired I am and how I wish I could get more sleep. I also worry about whether my milk supply is good enough, whether my baby is getting full, and whether I have the means to increase my supply. It can be stressful at times, but I remind myself that stress is not good for my milk supply, so I take deep breaths and stay calm.”
Letty, 33 years old mother of two
“To be honest my mind just wonders around, I can’t really say there’s anything specific I concentrate on unless on nights where I am tired and I get upset that the father is sleeping peacefully and here I am, bracing the cold feeding an eight months old baby”
FAQ’s: What Moms Really Think About While Breastfeeding
What do most mums think about while breastfeeding?
Many mums report a mix of thoughts and emotions while breastfeeding – ranging from feeling deeply connected and calm, to overwhelmed, bored or even anxious. It’s common for thoughts to wander during long or frequent feeds.
Is it normal to feel touched out or irritable while breastfeeding?
Yes. Some mothers experience a sensory overload known as feeling “touched out”, especially during cluster feeding or night feeds. This is a common emotional response and doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong.
Why do I sometimes feel emotional or sad when breastfeeding?
Some mums experience D-MER (Dysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex), which causes a brief wave of negative emotions when let-down begins. It usually passes quickly, but if it persists or worsens, speak to a healthcare provider.
Can I use breastfeeding time to relax?
Absolutely. Many mums use this time to rest, listen to music, watch TV, scroll on their phones, or even meditate. As long as you and baby are comfortable and safe, it’s a chance to mentally unwind.
Why do I feel bored while breastfeeding?
Feeding sessions can be long and repetitive, especially in the early months. Feeling bored doesn’t mean you’re ungrateful or disconnected—it’s completely normal and a sign that you may need more variety or stimulation.
Is it okay to think about things other than my baby while feeding?
Yes! You don’t have to be fully focused on your baby every single time. Mums often think about daily tasks, plans, work, or even just enjoy zoning out. Multitasking mentally is very common.
What should I do if I feel resentful or disconnected while breastfeeding?
You’re not alone. These feelings can be signs of mental or emotional fatigue. Reach out to a lactation consultant, therapist, or talk to other mums—it helps to share and normalise these thoughts.
Are there positive mental health benefits to breastfeeding?
Yes. Breastfeeding releases hormones like oxytocin which can promote bonding and reduce stress. However, experiences vary, and if breastfeeding negatively affects your mental health, support is available.
Can I talk to other mums about my breastfeeding experience?
Definitely. Many mums find reassurance and relief in speaking openly with others, especially in mum groups, online forums, or with lactation counsellors. Sharing your thoughts helps normalise the wide range of feelings involved.
Is it okay to stop breastfeeding if I’m not enjoying it?
Yes. Feeding decisions should support both baby and mother’s wellbeing. If breastfeeding becomes emotionally or physically draining, it’s okay to explore other feeding options and get professional advice.
Disclaimer: Every breastfeeding journey is unique. If you experience distressing emotions, anxiety, or signs of postnatal depression, please speak to your GP, clinic nurse or a lactation consultant.
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