Co-sleeping & bed-sharing with your baby: is it safe? This is a question that many parents ask as they consider what’s best for their baby’s sleep routine. While it offers comfort and closeness, it’s important to weigh the safety risks and benefits before deciding if it’s the right choice for your family. Many parents find co-sleeping a natural way to bond with their newborn, but it’s essential to understand the potential risks. This article by Good Night, child and sleep consultancy will explore expert opinions, safety guidelines, and tips to help you make an informed decision.
One of the most common questions my clients at Goodnight Baby ask is about when they need to move their babies out of their room and out of their own little cots. In a more hushed tone it sometimes follows, as if they’re sharing a dirty little secret: “In fact, when should they get out of my bed?” While I am a sleep expert, you know your family and your child best and thus a decision about where your child needs to sleep is up to you. Or rather, it’s up to you and your partner… Unless you are a single parent. Discuss the pros and cons of why you want to do it or why it might not be best for your family.
It is common misconception that if you want your child to sleep, they need to sleep in their own room. I am here to tell you that sleep can happen either way, BUT if you choose to co-sleep or bed share with your child, you need to do it safely. The reality is that new research shows that co-sleeping with younger babies is associated with higher risk of Sudden Infant Death.
How to bed-share or co-sleep safely
Start them out in a co-sleeper
For newborns the safest option is to use a co-sleeper. But once your baby can sit up at around 5 months this is no longer a safe option as the open sides of the co-sleeper are quite low and your baby is top heavy. If your baby looks over the side of the co-sleeper she can fall out. It’s also the reason why you should move your cot to a lower level at around the same time.
Older kids can fall out of bed
Once your baby can roll and move around more (between 5 and 8 months), your bed can be dangerous and then it’s best for baby to sleep on a mattress or on a very low bed, because there’s still a chance that she can fall out. Adult beds are not designed to ensure baby’s safety.
Choose the right mattress
Make sure your mattress is firm and that there are no cracks or gaps between the headboard, footboard or sides where your baby can get wedged in.
Don’t overcrowd the bed
Co-sleeping is NOT safe with baby and/or pets and other children. Other children and pets cannot take on the responsibility of caring for an infant.
Make sure everyone knows
Never sneak a baby into your bed without your partner being aware of it. If you all co-sleep you must acknowledge and take responsibility and both should see themselves as primary caregivers.
Be wary of medication or substances
If you have taken sedatives, medication, drugs, or alcohol you should not co-sleep with your baby. Of course there are other considerations as well, such as you and your partner’s space and time and the influence on each other’s sleep (either it’s you waking up your baby, or your baby waking you or your partner unnecessarily). Choose what works best and is the safest for you all. Whatever you choose, you and your child can sleep with good sleep habits.
References
BabyYumYum FAQs: Is Co-Sleeping & Bed-Sharing with Your Baby Safe?
What is co-sleeping?
Co-sleeping refers to sleeping in close proximity to your baby, which can include bed-sharing (sharing the same sleep surface) or room-sharing (baby sleeps in their own cot in your room).
Is bed-sharing with my baby safe?
Bed-sharing can increase the risk of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) and suffocation, especially in certain conditions. However, many parents do it, so it’s important to understand how to reduce the risks.
When is bed-sharing considered unsafe?
Bed-sharing is not safe if:
- You or your partner smoke
- You’ve consumed alcohol, drugs, or sedating medication
- Your baby was born prematurely or with low birth weight
- You’re extremely tired or sleep-deprived
- You’re sharing the bed with pets or other children
- You’re sleeping on a sofa or armchair
What’s the safest way to sleep with my baby nearby?
Room-sharing is safest. Keep your baby in a separate cot or Moses basket in the same room for the first six months, on their back, on a firm, flat mattress, with no soft bedding.
What are the benefits of co-sleeping?
When done safely, co-sleeping (especially room-sharing) can promote bonding, make night-time breastfeeding easier, and help parents respond quickly to their baby’s needs.
Can bed-sharing support breastfeeding?
Yes. Bed-sharing may increase the frequency and duration of breastfeeding, which is linked to health benefits for both baby and mother. Always balance this with safety considerations.
How can I make bed-sharing as safe as possible?
If you choose to bed-share:
- Place your baby on their back on a firm mattress
- Keep pillows, duvets, and soft bedding away from your baby
- Never bed-share on a sofa or armchair
- Make sure your baby can’t fall out of bed or become trapped
Are there cultural or practical reasons families bed-share?
Yes. In many cultures, bed-sharing is the norm. Some parents also choose it for bonding, breastfeeding convenience, or due to space limitations.
When should I stop bed-sharing?
There’s no fixed age, but most experts suggest transitioning to independent sleep when it begins to interfere with your or your baby’s rest, or before your baby becomes mobile and more active.
Is room-sharing safer than bed-sharing?
Yes. Room-sharing significantly reduces the risk of SIDS and is the recommended sleeping arrangement for at least the first six months of life.
Can co-sleeping become a sleep crutch?
Some babies become used to close contact for sleep. If you want to transition to solo sleep, do so gradually, using gentle sleep techniques to build independence.
Disclaimer: This information is for general guidance and does not replace medical advice. Always consult your GP or health visitor for personalised support regarding your baby’s sleep and safety.
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