Izingane Zes’thembu’s Tirelo Talks Motherhood and Polygamy with Mpumelelo Mseleku

Viewers of Mzansi Magic’s Izingane Zes’thembu were introduced to her as Mpumelelo Mseleku’s partner, navigating the complexities of a relationship rooted in traditional values such as polygamy. Yet, beyond the reality TV lens, she is a young woman forging her path academically, emotionally, and as a mother.

Tirelo describes her journey into motherhood as one that shaped her identity and shifted her priorities. Falling pregnant at a young age forced her to grow quickly and taught her responsibility and patience.

While she admits the journey hasn’t been perfect, she acknowledges the immense support she receives from her and Mpumelelo’s families. Goodwill Thomo chatted with her, and here’s what she shared.

You’ve been open about your pregnancy journey and becoming a mom at a young age. How did pregnancy change your outlook on life?

It has changed my outlook on life drastically. At some point, I was selfish and didn’t take life too seriously. Nothing felt that “deep” to me. But falling pregnant and becoming a mother at a young and unexpected age truly changed me. It moulded me into someone more responsible and less self-centred because now there’s a little human I must consider in everything I do. It really brought me back to reality.

What challenges, if any, did you face during your pregnancy or early motherhood? And what has the experience been like co-parenting with Mpumelelo Mseleku?

Honestly, my pregnancy was amazing. It was a smooth journey with no complications, and at times, I even questioned if I was indeed pregnant because I kept reading stories of people who had it much harder. Mpumelelo was supportive as a partner.
However, I didn’t anticipate that we would end up parenting from a distance. Our baby is in one province while I’m in another province studying. Singabakho currently stays with Mpumelelo’s mother. As tough as motherhood is, I’ve had support from both our families, and even though I’ve been going through a lot emotionally, I’m grateful for the people helping me cope.

What are some of the biggest lessons motherhood has taught you so far?

The biggest lesson is unconditional love. Growing up, I sometimes thought my parents didn’t love me just because they couldn’t buy me certain things. Now I understand love on a much deeper level; love that isn’t tied to conditions or material things. I’ve also learned patience, which was never a strength of mine. Motherhood has really stretched me in ways I never expected.

What advice would you give to someone navigating early motherhood?

I would tell them to always remember that before becoming a mother or someone’s partner, they were their own person. Don’t lose yourself. Your child deserves a mother who is mentally, physically, and emotionally well. There will be overwhelming moments, but there will also be deep joy and pride. Let gratitude shine through the chaos and hold on to those special moments.

What are your hopes for your son as he grows up, and what kind of future are you working to build for him?

I want him to grow up happy, strong, and kind. I want him to enjoy being a child without feeling pressured. As his mother, I’m doing my best to build a future where he feels supported and free to be himself. But I would prefer for my child not to pursue a polygamous marriage because of its complexities.

‘Izingane Zes’thembu’ has given many viewers a front-row seat into your life. What has it been like sharing such intimate parts of your journey with South Africa?

I thought it would be easy, but it’s been quite tough. Opening up to the whole country and letting them into my personal space has been challenging. I hoped the show would reflect what many of us are going through in society, but it wasn’t as simple as I expected.

How do you navigate the hate you experience on social media as a result of being on the show?

People only know a version of me based on what they see on TV. I stand firm in my truth and am content with who I am. People are entitled to their opinions, and while I can’t control that, I know who I am, and no one can take that from me.

When you first joined the show, did you anticipate how deeply people would connect with your story?

Not at all. I didn’t think too deeply about it at the start. I kept things light and thought my time on the show would just pass. I never expected people would connect with my story the way they have.

What would you say has been the most challenging and most rewarding part of being in the public eye?

The hardest part is dealing with the expectations people place on you. It feels like they want to control how you behave, even when the cameras are off. There’s pressure to live up to a version of me that isn’t fully real. But I stay grounded by remembering who I am and what I stand for.

Your relationship with Mpumelelo has had its fair share of ups and downs, especially with the conversation around polygamy. How do you feel about him wanting to take on more wives?

I don’t have a problem with polygamy, but I do think it needs to be done the right way. Mpumelelo must be honest and clear about what he wants. If the foundation isn’t strong, things will fall apart over time. I don’t mind him having more wives, but it needs to be respectful and structured.

What are the biggest misconceptions people have about your relationship?

One of the biggest misconceptions is that I’m with Mpumelelo because of fame or money; that’s simply not true.

If Mpumelelo does go through with his plans for polygamy, what boundaries or values would be most important to you as a partner and co-parent?

Respect and protection. These are very important to me, especially as a parent. I want to feel safe and respected, and I expect the same for my child.

You’ve shown so much emotional growth since season 1. What has helped you stay grounded through all the chaos of parenting, fame, and your relationships?

Not forgetting who I am. I know what I want, and I’m content with myself. That has helped me stay grounded.

How do you balance being Tirelo the partner, Tirelo the mother, and Tirelo the young woman still chasing her dreams?

I have a great support system that makes all the difference. Right now, Singabakho is not with me while I finish my studies, but when I get a break, it’s all about him. Having that support allows me to juggle everything from studies to parenting and pursuing my goals.

Is there anything you’ve learned about love or relationships that you wish you knew before becoming a mom?

I wish I had known how much effort love really requires. It’s not always rosy. Everything needs work.

If you could go back and give 16-year-old Tirelo one piece of advice, what would it be?

Focus on yourself and don’t rush through life. Everything happens in its time.